Son dad

dry memory of golden winter in games.

last week shown my more dependence on baby: 2 nights&2 days spent together
with baby son, &countless moments when alone enchanted by memories of gaming
on pc with the Spirit, baby son. the 2 weekends also saw baby started to
differentiate himself from some of my liked games, some occasions i had to
drag him to join our old games on the Acer notebook, from lingered in his
animation online. his mom quite addictive to QQ farm game, most of nights i
can imagine she left baby alone in animation while she busy with collecting
vegetables in the game i despised.
in the second half of the week, i saw quite of bliss from my girls. some
beautiful young lives in QRRS area re-appeared when i missing them days, for
they shown affection on me in these months while i felt i can't improve them
by weaving them into my closest life or family bond. but a radio in noon
break on Friday reminded me my expanding social graphic is family of Gospel,
is under God's shine, so never it turns burden for me, nor for my Royal of
China. for impossible is God, for plenty&peace of love is the ultimate
landscape sustains healthy&wealthy of people. my heart broaden by the
gospel, seeing Christian is the source of pleasure for anyone, seeing i can
exchange with girls that loves me with faith in goodness while i likely
passing them by.
this weekends full of games playing. i felt so exciting that a bit tired in
dorm after the 2 days. games brought me so many happy time, while my girls
longing for our gathering, that sometimes lets me sorry. but i trust God to
free me off anxiousness upon possible unbalanced response among endeared
callings. God, i don't want to be a nerd or geeky in the meaning for
self-indulge or self-entrenched, forever let beautiful things, including
human souls esp. of girls, enriches my life, upgrades my linkage with the
holy. God, never allow me failing my beloved, i entreat u.
BTW, in dawn of Saturday dreamed of lots of snakes under my clothes on my
body, caught one who biting my palm harmlessly. this dawn dreamed of being a
commander of Germany troop or some lateral organization, likely from the
game, lost horizon, i played with baby these days.

5/11/2010a night harbored near baby
i won a lot from web, as God grants. in office work time, clear most unread
feeds. left office soon after work over, buzzed baby for i felt touching
love&mercy on him in the dusk, found his mom stayed in her school while the
grandma there attending him. decided at once to go over to accompany him. he
was watching TV with his grandma when i arrived, his mom brought away the
game notebook, &the legacy desktop yet power on. so i turned on the
desktop&trying to show him newest games' trailer video. but his mom soon
returned. after dinner we joined our pastime games, succeeded some missions,
partially aided by online guide. his mom urged me to leave after some
gaming, but later allowed me to sleep on baby's bed, while the grandma slept
with her&baby son in bedroom. the night so happy till baby felt sleepy, for
he stayed 2 days at home for cold, &didn't nap in daytime as routine in
kindergarten. i busy with trying new games&theme packs on the Acer notebook,
after 10pm. in night i guarded in dream for my family. got up early but
don't felt exhausted. exchanged morning bliss with baby son, who got up
lately near breakfast, join office when it outside still like a frozen
weather. i hope i see sunshine later today, for time spent with baby son so
meaningful. God, bring me my new family with my girls. save my mother in
hometown who said dying ill.

4/11/2010mother's health reportedly
is a bright day. i read&d/l. refined hometown, Zhudajiu's google profile
even been blocked from saving changes for hours. the facing evil started a
business travel, while the monitor insisted closing office door to profane
nearby. God drove it away later, out of my notice. in night when i buzzed
baby, who still refused to receive my call, his mom told me my elder sister
from hometown told her my mother dying, &suggested me return to hometown. i
rebuffed, for economic reason as well as holy message. God, u see how my
life here meaningful. God, bring me my new family with my girls! i need a
family to cater to baby son, warrenzh, owner of, Hope of China.
i need a new family for the prosperous of new Empire of China reset. God, u

3/11/2010a night reunited with baby son&Asoh
sees my elation with game "medal of honor". left office with another bonus
from web&in time for dinner in canteen. the web answered via google our
problem in a game "lost horizon", can't help buzz baby when roamed outside
after dinner about the solution for the pinched mission in the game. but
baby refused to talk to me. in last Sunday dusk he shown reluctance to let
me leave, after a full day's gaming on notebook. so i sensed baby missing
me. near returning to dorm, i decided to visit baby&stay with him a night in
his mom's house. God grants my action. on the last bus, a girl student shown
me her tenderness, which aggravates my energy of sole presence. baby was
attended by his mom on his homework when i arrived. i waited silently aside
till he join me with the game "lost horizon", in which he insisted longer
than i expect to play. then i shown him game trailer of "medal of honor",
which quite refreshing him, among his mom's complain of late sleep. the
night i slept alone in baby's room&almost sleepless. dreamed of Asoh
Yukiko&our love making. it took longer time to satisfy ourselves in the
dream. also dreamed a graduated hometown girl. in dawn, talk to baby while
he on bedroom, that his everyday can not be more perfect in God's glory, &my
single task to expand our family on the earth. join office in bright
sunshine. God, bring me my new family to cater to baby's growth, God, i need
peace&luxury of family in new set.

2/11/2010a busy work
full of bliss. posted a blog to include baby son's photos in recent
gathering. posting was challenged by new spy&blocking network gears in the
company, likely just next floor in the same building, done narrowly this
morning. gays in office also exerted its best dirt upon me. but the fruit of
the day is sweet, no matter on stuff online or offline. in the night when i
roamed outside, sexual power lingered on me quite some time. this dawn i
woke up&sensed it again. i gradually recognized the source of the thick
desire. now its a brilliant early winter morning, God, bring my beloved to
me, let me join my girls in our new family! God, protect baby against
Son dad

1st snow of winter 2010, shallow drain of hope from sins.

last weekends again i had only half of a day to stay with baby son, but much
rewarding. we found lots of pleasure in games, a small game even brought
baby son fun to probe it. the sinful grandma there peeking baby&exert ill
will upon the holy, lured baby son to try to defeat a boy student there
restlessly. she even called me to watch the ugly game. baby&me, we soon
joined watching a game trailer online together, while the old demon exile
without our attention. so did the boy student. after his mom returned, baby
yet insisted my trying another shooting game with him before i left, around
5pm when dorm's canteen serves dinner. that's really a gliding happy time
among us.
mother still in treatment, &i hardly judge the perspective of her survival.
God surely heard my call&affirmative to me. i kept it calling in in morning
after i got up in serial days. however, yesterday my cellphone ran out of
charge, so i buzzed in lately at noon, when i waiting baby's mom from her
school outside of her house, after visited telcom office. i talked with my
younger elder sister&her husband, who came over together to see our ill
mother. i told her again my budget of ¥20000 for mom's restore her
health&survives another 3 years. she laughed&let me just keep on my own
business, let hometown relatives on their own.
returned to QRRS dorms, i listened a sermon can't be more cohesive. after
let baby know my taking part in church on phone, i launched to try hdr
composition of photos. after tried some small warez, i soon found photoshop
is the most powerful tool, killing any small softwares. i continued to
export my panorama via photoshop with new trust on it. the dorm's lavatory's
re-furnish also finished, i enjoy washing&toilet first time since the
noisy&dusty project launched.
this morning when i first caught sight of the sky outside, i sensed it might
snowed. it did. so i shot some photos from my window at once, preparing a
blog for the saint moment. i once doubting the killing by the white angels
might hurt my mother in ailment, but i insisted God promised me. after
breakfast, on way to office, i buzzed hometown, empty on the phone in my
passed dad's house. but eldest brother talked with me on his mobile, said
mother's health got improved. kid brother, who always active, brought his
wife&son to the county, likely let mother alone in the old house. so far, i
can't gain more positive news from my concerned. God, let it enough&steadily
resuming to normal.
Its a bright morning now. i had problem with upload my photos entrenched by
China surveillance, but God helps it proceeding forward. God, care my girl
young&agile. bring my new life in our prime time. God, let me have the
ability to upgrade baby's homework to digitize it, let me later or sooner
buy baby a child mobile, for which he longing. God, bring sunshine in my
life here&in my hometown. enhance my kid brother's finance with a sound&ever
growing business he likes.

From life as it
From life as it
From life as it
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hosted domestic.

echo of summer memory: happy seashore aside River Nen, where baby son played
months ago.
outside scene of benzrad's QRRS office: 1st snow&a shallow one in winter

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Son dad

ill mother recovering from fatal disease.

a blessing morning.^yesterday is a fruitful day. all things went smoothly as
expected. in the morning i buzzed dad's old house but empty. then buzzed
second elder brother, who simply told me mother getting better. i
laughed&told him my budget of ¥20000 for mom's survival another 3 years in
the world. he resolved&soon shut up. i worked in office immersed. then
eldest brother buzzed in, told me my kid brother returned from his
workplace, Guangdong, southern China, to Zhudajiu, &shifted mother to the
best hospital in Wuxue county again. such a relief!! sins in office
challenged me all day, but i more&more see the open space above the dirty
land. left office an hour earlier than work time, for the sunshine is gloomy
in later afternoon. in night in dorm, i reviewed the bravado of kid brother,
&sins in my second elder brother, who twice sent me to asylum while my kid
brother twice fetched me into normal world from torture&espionage&choking
asylum in China nowadays. quite some secrets the elder brother kept away
from me. i also saw the dark in mother's life&soul, while dad, God's silent
efforts to save me in years sufficiently. in dawn dreamed of mother. also
dreamed my baby son, or my kid brother, found infection in center of his
palm, i penetrated with needle&found a worm inside. i picked the worm into
my palm, which got infected at once, but disclosed the blister, a bird, or
at least a mouth like bird's beak nested inside. i killed it with needle at
once. waked up by cell's alarm, buzzed eldest brother&kid brother in
hometown. expressed obligation to kid brother's financial support for
mother's treatment, promised him my reward when my life renew&improved.
slept again till near 9:40am, when baby son finished his music lesson
nearby. rushed out of dorm to wait outside of the school, till we gathered,
told baby son the workable of ¥1500 budget for his homework's digitization,
explained him the merit of the solution. baby listened&raised some
questions. after he&his grandma took bus, i returned dorm to fetch my work
suite&join office. the restaurant near office with a sinful chef first time
refused my debt lunch, its a bliss for me, so i lunched in another pub. God,
i even urgent need a partner in my life here, bring my girls into our new
marriage. God, let me taste the wine of hub of harmony family life again! i
really missing it very much!

22/10/2010a milestone for mother in illness.^yesterday i kept busy most
time. buzzed in the beginning of morning, eldest brother in hometown talked
to me. i told him my plan of ¥20000 budget for mother's restore health&lives
at least another 3 years. in office, i finished keeping alive family skype
accounts, claimed a new one for China Democracy, the namespace God recently
encouraged me to sustain. read all day, left office near 6pm till web stuff
in pocket. a gay in dorm recently haunted around me, ignited my deep
vomiting upon the ugly&sinful. buzzed baby&arrange weekend meeting up. i
decided buzzing mother every morning in period of her staying bed. its a
bright morning. elder brother just told me mother's situation improved. i
laughed&emphasized my budget for them. God, bring me warmth of family, with
my mother, with my beloved baby, with my girls i trying to reach out so long
on the cyberspace, as well as for the emerging Empire of China reset for
1109 years in my title from my ancestor's bliss from God. God, i know, my
new life just descends on horizon like morning star. fresh&saint is her
name. God, u see.
BTW, found a photo of mother shot by amateur photographer equipped with DSLR
cameras visiting the village, Zhudajiu. i hope i can find the source
file. [image:
mother in focus of visiting amateur
its unique id is 058dc13b16c3c880954be4d3714b2aa5.
21/10/2010mother at hometown suffering Ascites&in lapse.^yesterday baby's
mom, emakingir talked to me when online about a passing life of her
colleague after 3 months suffering cancer. she suggested me buzz my hometown
relatives. i buzzed mother first, but empty on other side in air. then i
buzzed my young elder sister, who told me mother kept on bed for 3-4 days
after returned from hospital. i buzzed mother again, the wife of my eldest
brother there attending my mother received my phone, said hospital cost
¥3000 or more. buzzed second elder brother, he said mother likely dying,
&suggested let it go&inform me if thing go worse. i buzzed my eldest
brother, aiming to talk to mother via his cellphone for land phone is in
another room from my mother currently settled, but empty again. i insisted
buzzing dad's old house, and mother on her own received my phone about near
7pm. i urged her building stronger will power to survive, and our future can
be even brighter as time&God brings forth. mother complained cold&we stopped
chat in air. the night no doubt i saw many omens. before went to bed, i made
of mind that i loan from my 2 elder brother ¥20000 for striking death away
from our mother. in dawn, i buzzed to mother, eldest brother there talked to
me, i told him i will write bill within coming 20 years for ¥10000 for
mother, ¥5000 for 2 brother each, if mother survive the illness&aging for
another 3 years. brother admitted it, told me an aunt&her daughter visiting
my mother on bed. i tried to buzz younger elder brother but unavailable. i
hope my message arrives the moment i decided.
God, its so brilliant a morning. Dad, i know u beside me. save my mother&let
my world even stronger, let peace&glory surround my business here on the
planet under ur shine! God, let me do the right&timeless life forever
instilled in my beloved. God, bring my girls into my new life ahead, which
must be more enjoyable in soul&materially. God, raise my mother above
sins&ailments. God, be with me!
a bright&busy morning.^got up early to make water. woke up till sunshine
redden the higher building outside of my dorm's window. buzzed eldest
brother who attending in dad's old house about my support of ¥20000 in
budget for mother's survival among her illness now threatening her life, in
20 years ahead. in office activated family accounts with video chat site,, kept alive family accounts with skype&claimed some new for
family newer namespace. done in shines. then buzzed younger elder brother
about my financial wishlist against mother's failing upon aging&ailment. the
brother not so appreciate my act&shut chat abrupt. God, save my mother&bring
peace&glory in my world which so busy&meaningful. God, cast ur warm sunshine
over my ailing mother in cold&suffering.
benzrad's comment on the day.riots all over the mainland of China nowadays,
burning pains in Chinese
Posted by <>
benzrad zhu<>
to benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon
killing cadre&cop, China's machine dog system, is the most urgent task for
China nowadays. they can torn&swallow all Chinese on mainland as their prey.

靖西暴动(大图组图) - 人人网 校内-



saint and insane,
Posted by <>
benzrad zhu<>
to benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon
no one can save China mainland nowadays except the savor. sins&sink of China
never clearer&dooming than this moment in this event of Dr. Fang's

even sad upon the miserable Dr. Fang, new hope of China as an
by me, benzrad<>,
never more clearer&promising.





20/10/2010bright morning.^yesterday refined my blogger blogs' template,
corrected wrong auto post. in night after dinner went out to receive baby
son who had music lesson near QRRS Dorms. i talked to him about my efforts
ahead to digitize his homework by installing tablet&printer, including his
mom's old camera. his mom rebuff as usual but baby listened carefully&didn't
comment. returned to dorm, reviewed the plan. join neighbor dorm&taught some
pc skill, gays in&around let me have to clean myself by music from my
notebook. in dawn dreamed one of my alumni, a Wang, with his fake wife
visited me&tried to cheat us. my eldest brother also did. then in a cinema,
the high rank in QRRS, a Zhou, with his wife in a joint chamber talked to
me. his wife tested me with a riddle, turning out to let me fetch food for
its a brilliant morning. God, bring my new life with rich pleasure with my
girls. let me act in free of short of money.
Son dad

dark under light&hope

Its a bright morning. i pushed recent tweets to web. God, in an era of
competing for darkness&ugliness i don't save nor bless. in ur ordain, i kill
or subdue all those rebellions against Holy. God, instill power&energy in
me, lead me through the dirty with my Empire of China intact.
14/9/2010dog licking its paws.^today again a bliss. gaining pleasure from
the web. facing evil stayed all noon break in office, upset me for i usually
at that time sang alone in office. the sin all day challenged me on its
seat. after dinner went to receive baby son who join his music lesson since
left his kindergarten. a local mafia member passed me&let me in a cold
shock. also many dubious men among the waiting parents outside of the music
school. these 2 days the office sins frequently talked about local mafia in
aim to daunt me. a wedding ceremony likely through the broker, a fake
gangster in neighbor office of news department of the enterprise cable TV,
enrolled 3 out of 4 professional TV cameras secretly, overtly against
official mandate that professional TV cameras not allowed to service
personal or folk events, while the company officially hosting a meeting
which also demands shooting. most China mainland state-owned enterprise
indeed under influence or control of mafia, which fed by the
blood-thirsty&brutal authority since birth of PRC and grew into more and
more losing patience with curtain of lies of Commonwealth with the society.
i invited baby to dine in KFC&he gladly accepted, even in his mom's
complains. there r again dubious persons in the restaurant, baby also
restless on his seat, but after all its a good time for us, for the
gathering so harmonious, so peculiar. God, summon me for ur task here on the
planet, I'm fearless in the mob of evils. killing is not a problem for me,
and my revenge is famous for its bitter&acid. lots of bloodshed will
mushroom on the scary land, i assert.

13/9/2010a happy weekends.^this weekends full of games play. On Saturday i
busy with migrating data between my mobile disk&a extended hard disk on
legend home pc. on Sunday i rebuilt a clean os from backup with new
patched&updates, then backup again, till baby&his mom dined out with her
sister-in-law's family and returned. baby quite enjoyed our gaming time,
laugh&scream a lot. the sunshine in the 2 days extra bright, baby's mom,
emakingir, even complained stingy. in Saturday night, we three join a party
hosted by baby's music lesson's school, xiaoyin music school (, which is a franchise network all the China mainland.
but the party hardly to be interesting. on Sunday night, i sang again in
dorm after settled the day creatively, for solitude&absence of my girls.
today is Monday, the sunshine still brilliant, so hopeful in my life-long
devotion. i pray God saves my works online, bring closer my new life in new

10/9/2010got up earlier. started to blog after made water. in office claimed
more short url for family sites with its bright&a student drum team
performing outside for teacher's day. so nice. read the morning blog:
enjoy short url with dreamed of Japanese family.^continued to refine
family main blogger blogs, added statistics sidebar, check latest refinement
on them. refined chrome settings. read&d/l. claimed family account with,
a new shortening url service from, devised some custom url for
family sites. baby's mom visited with her school here the meeting hall of
QRRS, brought me ¥100&borrowed my ball pen. sorted portable in the end of
work time. bought 2 new ball pen, including a green ink pen after 7pm. sang
in dorm for God&solitude till neighbors visited. rest all night without any
engagement. lately tried calling sally, found her ditched her old mobile
numbers we used when i was in my hometown back to May, 2010. in dawn dreamed
of visiting Japan. the hosting family has a son&a daughter. they treated me
very well. on a small hill near their house, they likely discussing dividing
it. i love the family. there appears more relatives, and likely they shared
or abiding my passed dad's rule. i decided to inherit dad's arrangement&act
accordingly. woke up by urination before 6am. its a golden morning outside.

9/9/2010dreamed of Ramadan.^last afternoon busy refining all family blogger
blogs with new template&google buzz sidebars&footer till 7pm left office.
dined out by debt. in dorm restored os on notebook. talked about kid
brother's strange response, which suggests over-exhausting or weak stance
upon baits or conspirations, in the night with baby's mom, emakingir. in
dawn dreamed of Ramadan in village. i asked for food of Ramadan from an
Imam, cheating or not. its a bright morning again. God, saves my
work&merging reality of my Royal of China. saves my new family with my
beloved girls.

From grows Son<>
From grows Son<>
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baby son, warrenzh, owner of, leaving his music school with his
mom, emakingir, after lessons

baby son, warrenzh, owner of, his crayon paintings: loose
straws. <>

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Son dad

days in light.

7/9/2010these days collecting games from web brought me so many
breathtaking moments that i frequently call title of God to accept my
obligations&witness the full of life. every moment when i alone, i counted
my loot with melting elation. in the weekends, i spent 2 days with baby in
his mom's house, routed from my dorm. we had great times, succeeded missions
in games, enjoy soliciting electronic war field in a team or emotionally
together. baby alone started to try a bowling game, after i found him likes
bowling&suggested e-bowling. he asked his mom lately to compete with him in
the bowling game, and really mastered quite some expertise of the game his
parents dumbfound. the weekends were cloudy days, but our hearts full of
Sunshine. before i returned to dorm in the end of weekends, he asked me to
join him every full weekends from now on, and i can't be more happier to
accept his companion invitation.
these days office Internet seemingly got coarser surveillance. i had
encountered since last week several knockouts during surfing. the browser
can't open web pages, while download waded into several KB/s while usual
full load sustains 300KB/s. this Monday i had to quit&shot down my
notebook&switch for half of an hour when the facing evil absent after 3
times China censorship blocks down my connection. the facing evil all time
faultfinding, so its likely a plot to ignite friction between&fuel of
blames&angry among the blood-thirsty mob in the office, a place in fact of
tomb of dying bitter losers, just attempting to bury me with
humiliation&harm lawful. in the sunshine of noon, i pray God prepares me for
activities offline, like reading ebooks for research, try games, to avoid
the trap&defeat meaninglessness, which the unavoidable shameful product of
those mob in office, mostly original worst of blue collars promoted by
bribery or nepotism, but if luckiest, i would still enjoy gaining from web
as i did so long with the Internet routinely. God, pardons me lingering
online too much, grants me more time in solitude&harmonious family life. u
know how i am urgent to find a new wife&life, in full view&rein of my
this morning dreamed of Zoo.^Dreamed of the administrator of a zoo. he had
sold most of land of the zoo, but still run short of currency to run a zoo.
his staff also leaving. i also dreamed of animals in the zoo. its a bright

[image: bright morning sunshine outside of benzrad's QRRS
From life as it

6/9/2010refined baby&my profile knols. commented on web. Internet
deteriorated 3 times&i had to reboot accordingly. the facing sin challenged
heavily. read&hunt new pc games. enjoyed dinner. too cool to sit outside.
roamed outside, met&nodded to a retired chairman of board of QRRS, a
bullshit once dorm mate now a dirty office politician in department of
accounting within the dying for outdated company. sorted stuff in night.
praying God don't break my passionate engagement with games.
a meaning full weekends.^this weekends spent with baby in 2 days. we made
progress on our favorite pc games. baby specially attracted by elf bowling
7, &said played with his mom later than 10pm in Saturday night. my kid
brother borrow my logo design for family namespace, faezrland. i sent him
via a neighbor's Internet access in dorm. gays in the dorm started to harass
me with their ill behavior, after some occasions i side-watched their play
with pc for fun. its golden autumn. baby asked me from now on spending every
full weekends with him, such a nice suggestion, i never felt enough to be
with him. its sunny now in this morning even cloudy when i joined office.
benzrad's comment on the day *两岸关系: 人民日报宣扬中共领导抗战胜利
- 法国国际广播电台<>
bbenzrad zhu <> - righteous
rebuff! history of PRC full of dirt and tentative errs need rewrite.10:10 am

failure of any Chinese stemmed from sinful mainstream of PRC <>
Lee is the living failing Chinese between China&the western. he nothing but
a cheater&loser, even once witness the plenty&creative in western culture.
he is far from a broker between sino-US, but a shameless traitor of google
even when google still paid him. he is the vivid coward and inferior of
Chinese as born with weak backbone, a fart licker of autocratic PRC. his
career as well as personal life after left google doomed to be nothing but
void&noname. world doesn't echo his new brag of business but a laugh

Google warned on China plans
By Kathrin Hille in Beijing

Published: September 5 2010 18:51 | Last updated: September 5 2010 18:52

Google’s technological lead over Baidu has eroded, the company’s former
China head has said, highlighting the increasing challenges western internet
companies face in the world’s most populous internet market.
In an interview with the Financial Times, Kai-fu Lee said western internet
companies had no chance in China unless they build a more nimble and
flexible local presence and retain a strong technological edge.

the future gap and judged of Chinese
Fang's honest wins him forever dignity. God blesses honest Chinese, and only
honest Chinese. hell Chinese nowadays on mainland China, esp those well fed
by the dirty society nowadays.
views See this Amp at
irresistible sink of PRC, rotten society with losing ethic of standing.the
well worded principle always a corner part of the larger ethic reality. in a
bankrupt society like PRC, nothing ordered, or even well versed, can't save
the mainstream nor ethic national.

路透社新闻手册之“标准和价值观” from

See this Amp at

3/9/2010finally accessed myspace.^yesterday i was in elation after i
gained&supplemented a broken archive from web near 6pm. my thx to God is
saint&thick. baby's mom still in afraid of talking money with me after see
through my poor salary, coarsely let me shut up when i referred what i
bought, like some tea yesterday. in the night trusted neighbor roommates
help fixing my cellphone can't access Internet via wap for months. they both
reluctant to let me check their cell's setting but browse my cellphone.
after all they failed me. this morning again a brilliant sunny morning. God
allows me posted recent 2 blog entries to myspace, which refute my logon for
more than 3 days by ill response broken by proxy disabled by China
censorship. God, i see more miracles&fruits of work through ahead. Thx for
what u done on me.
benzrad's comment on the day. irresistible sink of China nowadays with no
resistance to sin&sinister. 沉疴不治的中国the dying China society, deepest core sin
is the authority, or its back bone, Marxism vented by Russian. no cure for
nowadays China, except total collapse&rebuilt into Empire under Zhu's, the
Emperor of last native Chinese nation.
PRC, to its best, is a prototype of dark power from sins among
German&Russian, outdated in today's world since the flagship product, the
Russia Red's collapse back to 1991. PRC as its best, is a cheap commodity
like what it produces in these 20 years in global economy.
i, benzrad <>, 朱子卓 <>, here
assert again, i will ruling China in an Empire reset for 1109 years that
comes soon. China belongs to the Son, while Chinese redemption&sacrifice to
God long time is due and as the only way out of the world.

方舟子的个人空间--方舟子 <> |

2010年09月02日 10:40:10


See this Amp at via<>
Posted via email <> from benzyrnill, set to fly, like
dragon fly...鸠昱隆嘉<>

2/9/2010dreamed of Chinese Kong Fu, or Taoism.^yesterday is busy. after work
time the facing sin again stayed in office till i left before 6pm. after
daily exercise, ie. rest on garden bench, jog around the front space of
QRRS, rest on bed&dozed, till a neighbor guy visited. later dropped him a
visit but nothing special. in dawn dreamed of a girl from working class with
me join a Chinese Kong Fu class, whose tutor in fact a fake Chinese kongfu
master. i left earlier, but years after when i met the girl, she told really
Chinese Kong Fu means, there r real breath method, space orientation rules,
etc. she reinforced quite a lot by the practice. she got the fake master's
baby but finally left the cheating person. after work up, i see God's way no
other but my way, only i gifted with the real source of
mightiest&timeless&most glorious. but God offers many ways to show human the
source of life&supernatural.

[image: peaceful warm autumn sunset in QRRS front

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Son dad

storm gaining momentum out of my call.

1/9/2010prepared for starvation emotionally.^yesterday narrowly a busy day.
posted a blog, managed finding missing parts of web stuff. sorted stuff
lately. the office was full, with all members. i lingered for ten and more
minutes after work time, till Internet on corp lan down. its strange but i
know China surveillance acting upon. when i left the office, the street
stood thick guarding cops. i waited for baby&his mom out of his music school
after left notebook in dorm. after carried baby on my shoulders, i told him
our family duty: 1. bring Chinese to God YHWH. 2. ruling China as an Empire
rest in 1109 years to come. i told him his dad forever in God's set, no one
luckier than him in the world. accompany baby haunting KFC, where his mom
brought me ¥200 for life support. my financial deficit is about ¥1200, and i
want to buy a new Dell game notebook about ¥6000 in this year end, ¥1000 for
domains renewal or pay back for Taiwanese friend help me registering. God,
my life is meaningful but don't act mean. bring my new life to me.
with money in pocket, i dined near office, with toast beef stick&manually
sliced needle. in the restaurant the daughter weeping for her dad scorned
her. i taught a lesson to his dad as well as some other family member of the
boss, customers there till finished my dinner&left. in the night there r
many crackers&fireworks. i know God's affirmative&new landscape disclosure
from fogs loomed so far. 31/8/2010blog upon threats from demons.^prepared a
blog entry, including making a panorama of QRRS dorms, where i lingered for
transit to my new marriage, from recent photos. its a bright morning, but
sometimes cloudy. myspace ill responded, likely China surveillance broke
between or spy hijacked my account there. praying God prepare me for looming
starvation, for my finance turns poor.
read and d/l. created baby son account with radiotime. sorted portable. late
night around 9:30pm, buzzed baby about perished situation around me, urged
him his dad belongs to God, no matter on the earth or absent, he in God's
arrangement, and never can human trap.
27/8/2010dog shows teeth.^read lately. then the sin on facing desk returned,
half drunk. just after the monitor left&work time over, it start to curse
me. i tried to dial to the high rank, a Zhou, the department director, a
Wang, and finally the corporate cops. the first two absent on the other end
of phone. when a cop talked with me on phone, the deputy director works
locally&the hard core gay in facing room along aisle talked to the
dog&accompany it left. i praying God for able to do task i like. then the
dog returned&continued to abuse me. i see the plot of machine dog, China
surveillance. after peacefully sorted stuff, i left before 5:45pm or so. im
glad with what i gained from web. after dinner i rest on dorms' garden
bench, after several days' break for lingering in office after work time.
lately in dusk i roamed outside. buzzed baby earlier before cellphone
battery ran out. baby claimed he likes more his mom. i congratulate his mom
for baby's claim. later near 8:12pm, i buzzed again, attempting to discuss
with baby my unbalance, but he refused to talk in air. i love him so much.
never in the world a character can split us, the holy trinity. God, today
really brilliant!
26/8/2010family domains expand to include more member sites.^last night has
the idea to adopt short url for new subdomains under family domains.
launched at once after settled in office near 6:30am, till near 3pm see dust
down. new subdomain outlets more family blogs hosted on world prominent blog
portals, like posterous ( ), tumblr ( ), or wordpress
(setup finished but for wordpress charges for custom domain remapping, i
laid it off). sorted bookmarks then. attending d/l let me restless. its such
a great day, that i want a beer, but unfortunately i dislike it.
after all, God, save my works against China surveillance. bring me into new
life toward my second marriage. save my beloved in this dirty world in
nowadays China.
25/8/2010dreamed of disputes with baby's mom.^yesterday is a full work load
day. attending d/l till after 6pm. just after i ate some fruits baby's mom,
emakingir buzzed in. baby just finished music lesson closely near my dorm.
carried baby son walked with ema till she complained too late to linger. in
night turned agile&haunted neighbors in the dorm to watch how they made fun
with computer&Internet. in dawn dreamed twice disputes with baby's mom. its
a quite bright morning. refined some family google apps' sites' pages.
checked family emails routinely. God, saves my works which so concrete.
24/8/2010a wonderful day with a raining start.^heavy rain in dawn. join
office in rain. prepared&posted recent photo of dining out in a Chinese
cuisine restaurant with a blog entry. delayed so far since morning for the
publish of photos to web album yet can’t finish with a link. read all time.
later chatted with baby’s mom, who prepared baby’s profile photo for his
music lesson. it turns sunny or cloudy since noon. God, saves the beautiful
day with my works. save my Royal of China, the saint of my Empire of China.
Son dad

summer once lavish, fading into golden history.

Its a raining day this morning, exactly as Chinese lunar calendar indicting,
Chushu, 处暑, summer heat is over. i walked barely in rain with my work suite,
ie. notebook&camera, to join office, for every work day is meaningful for
me, cultivation, accumulation, and harvest. last afternoon it also rained
amid sunshine, its in fact a sun rain, i told baby its the most blessing
weather. we had a longest time in years playing pc games together and
succeeded most missions while his mom napped in another room. then we dined
out. here r the moment we gathered&dined. baby naught a lot in the dinner,
with his favorite food Guobaorou, flour coated pork. his mom these day
frequently complained enough of him. after dinner, the rain stopped, we
walked back, and i departed them on the ground near baby's mom's house.
after returned to QRRS dorms where i lingered for my new marriage, i
directly join local church from bus stop, listened a nice preach by the male
Priest, who elaborates more on bible, comparing his female pal who only
recited poems or quotation from bible. the preach again discussed strong
believing as my favorite. after the believers left, i expressed obligation
to the Priest, we both felt blessed. on the garden of the dorm, i buzzed
baby&his mom, who more and more felt at a loss in our once broken marriage.
i buzzed twice to encourage baby lives in patience to see the bright days,
for only with bitter or tasteless, we enjoy more the elation and sweat of
bliss when it pours in. quite some girls in the dorms haunted outside around
me. i can't say other but it all can't be more accomplished.
in the night, i roamed in dorm, reviewing my good time and ahead. sometimes
i can't but sang loudly. i also drank a bit. God, u see how close the day of
my wedding beset. my baby son badly need a new mother to cook him delicacy.
i badly need a soul of girl accompanies&shares our love to u, the Mightiest.
God, rid me of anxious, bring my girls to me, to my new Empire of China.
That's my another happy weekends.
Ps:delayed so long since last morning for the publish of photos via email,
yet can't finish blogging before including the link of the album. read all
time. later chatted with baby's mom, who prepared baby's profile photo for
his music lesson. it turns sunny or cloudy since noon. God, saves the
beautiful day with my works. save my Royal of China, the saint of my Empire
of China.
From farewell to lavish
From farewell to lavish
From farewell to lavish
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for picasaweb&flickr blocked within China mainland, the shit&dog dominated
sinful land, here some digest of photos hosted domestically.
benzrad, 朱子卓, in restaurant amid a sunrain, shot by warrenzh, 朱楚甲.
baby son posed for shot for an profile photo for his music class, after
dined out.

See and download the full gallery on posterous<>
Son dad

bliss descends with new domain,

its drizzling when i breakfast in QRRS dorms canteen&heading to office in
this weekend. this dawn i had a wonderful dream. i first dreamed of matching
in dark. people were put in dark&sex with matches reached in dark house. i
trying to find my mate but didn't excite. then dream raising a fish, namely
likely Giant salamander, then in an exam to report on the fish. i always
hate exam. after exam, i saw a younger fish accompany the fish we raise, the
latter then has its gender. then i informed that the fish's tail and meat
above shouldn't be eaten as a custom. woke up&reviewing baby's asking not to
be God sometimes those days, i was so blessed that baby son, warrenzh, God
of Universe, exactly my son, my dearest son. the bliss so great that i got
up at once. a drizzle already passed over just amid my dream, after i made
water in dawn. the breakfast is plausible, includes a sweat pie. on way to
office, it drizzled again, so many loves from Masheng, my Crowned Queen of
yesterday i visited baby son in his mom, emakingir's house. ema still in
loss in her refusal loan of 400rmb to let me buy family 4th domain, ( ). i criticized her in our QQ chat. but my
Taiwanese friend help me after rebuffed me once buy the domain exactly
yesterday as i suggested in memory of Masheng, who long time urges me to own
continents against future world disaster. ema buzzed me twice but both
didn't reach me in noisy situation. soon after i arrived there, i told i
need her loan, which greatly relief her. she lost 1900rmb and more last
weekend when she answered my call on way to River Nen with baby son. that
money was offered by me to buy her a e-bike to carry baby son route his
kindergarten, for ema complained baby grows that she hardly carry him with
her old bike. its all time a bright Saturday, i also showered in public
bathroom. baby enjoyed ice cream&candy i bought by the way. i backup stuff
from web, tried new games on his notebook. baby glad to see the fresh game
experience. near 3pm, i hold him slept on my shoulders. then held him on my
arms, till later shifted to bed. his mom urged me to leave, so i returned to
dorm, where i ate an early dinner.
in reviewing the glory of my family, my heart often fulfilled with proud.
God, the only missing is my beloved girls, esp the girl on the train when i
returning to Qiqihar from my dad's hometown, back to Jun 5,2010, and my girl
Zhou, once appeared&hunted after by me till the company startled&stopped me.
i know they praying for me, bring us together, God!

6/8/2010 cloudy morning with periodical sunshines.^for no available helping
hands for loan for my new domain, i decided trying alipay, a Chinese copy of
paypal. waiting the process finished to let me pay overseas. this morning is
cool, but periodical sunshine very bright&aspiring. sorted stuff, activated
baby's mom, emakingir's 163 mobile email box, retouch her signatures. its
the first day the company complies new national common exercise ordain.
China steadily falls into trifle&loosing off&losing end. the old time
collective exercise helps none but the dead in chamber, kills nothing but
time&creativeness. See this Amp at 5/8/2010hopeful
a new domain join my titles soon.^read. talked to Taiwanese friend for loan
to buy a new domain for my web id. sorted bookmarks to include it&backup.
backup family google knol to zoho wiki. sorted stuff before dinner. in dorm
prepared confidential for family new member site. its a pale morning. 2
friends rebuff my plan of buy the domain. i had to delay the registry. dozed
awhile after lunch, dreamed of losing in exam, which i dislike very much.
4/8/2010dreamed of new domain buy&restless reckons of debt.^read. refined
autopost to posterous among family amplify accounts. got "starcraft Ⅱ"
finally, amid praying God for pardon me lingering in office for games.
played badminton with the couple whose wife worked in neighbor office after
dinner. baby didn't talk to me in daily buzz. dreamed of buy one or two
domains for my web id, indecisive upon the cost, for my poor financial
status hardly supports. join office earlier than 7am. a pale morning like
yesterday but still i felt Masheng's love. God, what's the gap between our
3/8/2010warned of vilification from familiars.^last afternoon chatted with 2
young folks from Zhudajiu, my hometown. one serving in Chinese Navy. in
night God notified me of stab from the back by folks seemingly intimates.
dreamed a lot in dawn. sorted os after found its infectious. China
surveillance blocked my os auto-update for quite some cases, till i adopt a
lan proxy&done. office turns a hell at noon, for all crews stayed, just aim
to espionage&challenge me. felt glad with a cleaner os. Masheng, save my
Son dad

new hope of peace, party and timeless love.

the journey from my hometown, Zhudajiu, to Qiqihar, where baby son,
warrenzh, lives with his mom, emakingir, cost me 3 days. ticket was bought
by the sinful nephew who hated me for a long time against the glory my
family shines. i had to accept the slowest train. its my first time seeing
the new train station of Wuchang, one section of Wuhan. the waiting hall
quite jammed, but i met a woman foreigner&exchanged some words. on the train
i chatted with quite some interesting people, including some kids from Hunan
Prov., a disgusting squad from Xiaogan, Hubei Prov., a cute kid girl from
Hebei Prov., and a wine vendor who migrated from Qiqihar to Hebei for more
than 10 years. near Harbin, 6 or 7 Muslim from Pakistani aboard, some of
them play hide-and-seek with neighbor Chinese boys. i was touched by the
kindness, so lately join them&discussed bible with them in English. with the
holy shines over me, i caught in the last minute&aboard the train to Qiqihar
from Harbin. a tall girl stood against the corridor greatly enchanted me, we
gazed to each other for quite some time, and the holy bliss, with drizzle
outside, enlightened most of the lounge. i followed the girl after we left
the railway station, and told her my Chinese name before we departed. how i
missing her, who should marry me now as my second Chinese wife. gathering
with baby son was a saint moment. he refused to receive me when i knock out
his mom's door. after i bathed in public bathroom he picked me and played
with me. he beat me with his shoe for quite some time till his mom halted
him. i lingered in his mom's house for a week, neither office nor public
presence. baby still arranged by his mom to attending his kindergarten. we
gamed on pc for quite some hours. i promised him if his mom don't drive me
away, i will stay till seeing he sleep alone in his room, instead of sleep
with his mom now in his room, and shower with me in public bathroom. i also
make it clear to his mom, emakingir, that we r free of any obligation with
each other. i told her i would like to live in dorm as soon as baby sleeps
on his own, while at this stage she didn't grant baby sleeping apart from
baby son always has the best idea. last Saturday he suggested family
haunting Lun river, which a half of hour bus from his mom's house. and i
long time since return from my hometown journey suggested letting me treat
baby son with his favorite restaurant. baby likes buffet as usual. ema
arranged it around 2pm in Sunday. its really a bright tour, we babbled a lot
on the bus, waved lots of bubbles in the river Lun, shot lots of wonderful
photos in the river. and when ema felt hungry, baby narrowly agreed to
leave, with the promise we will return there next week. in buffet i
completed my dinner soon, while ema prolonged the pleasure as her best. the
coffee really nice, arrest both of the adult in the family. God sees. now i
first time enjoy surfing under my account since the tour back to Qiqihar.
surely brighter the sky above me and my Royal of China.

1/7/2010God brings me back.^prepared recent photos for posting in early
morning. then elder brother informed the Internet account again resumed by
its subscriber. retouched logo for site, for original design's
source file missing within my backup. the sister-in-law join the CCP's
party&asked mother went over to help her caring her grandson. Watched TV
after lunch&dozed awhile, then had the idea to return Qiqihar, now that the
heat here a bit daunts me. God arranged it all right. informed baby's mom,
emakingir. also asked elder brother to speed up to find me a Internet
solution for a week when i can search traffic&ticket information to back to
Qiqihar. its the most strong sunshine today in my this hometown journey.

30/6/2010dreamed of dispute with ema over baby's custody.^dreamed of
touching love with baby. his mom attempted to dispare us, and accused of my
mental disorder history. walked through a neighbor factory with seemingly
another man, baby son or other person let me unease, where workers gathered
discussing my situation. passed their rest room&woke up before leaving the
roughly setup family 3rd domain,^got up earlier, lauched soon
newly claimed domain,'s site content on registrar's free host, as
well as Google apps for it. remapping url for blog,www, etc. roughly clone
family 1st domain,'s content to the new site. claimed groups with
vodpod with family most namespaces. backup bookmarks&settings for portable.
quite fruitful this morning, which is sunny.
a rich dinner, brewing pork with corn.^attending d/l most day. quit near
5pm&felt hungry. dinner quite rich, corn is very sweet&juicy. it rained late
afternoon but stopped after dinner. hope baby&his mom can come over to taste
delicacy here. most night reading.

29/6/2010enjoy&suffer for d/l.^got up&let d/l, then napped again till
breakfast. read most day. in late afternoon prepared content for new domain,, but disappointing logo's source file evaded among my backup. it
drizzled in afternoon but last no more than an hour. backup stuff from web.
sunburn awhile, talking with Masheng on busy&leisure. hope i can make time
more meaningful.
a rich dinner&video chat.^haunted outside before dinner. again walked alone
the road connecting the village. i really missing baby son&hope he visit
here next month, God, u know. drank at dinner, among neighbor's female
watching. it drizzled then. watched awhile TV, then chatted with baby&his
mom online. i sure will see their journey in end of July to dad's hometown.
benzrad's comment on the day.benzrad朱本主子卓 (

28/6/2010finally got haircut.^mother woke me up to go haircut. she said she
met a guy who last dusk promised to send me to market to haircut.
prepared&went to see those motor drivers. the guy was absent in his new
house, while elder brother, who also has a motor, repairing a phone. the
youngest son of the dark house in front of my dad's house, ready to leave
for his workshop, so he fetched me&left me on the only barbershop on his
way. but i waited for almost an hour before the barber arrival. i shot
photos before&after haircut, felt glad. washed hairs at home before
breakfast. now surfing. its cloudy now.
mother bought pork.^read most day. arranged more to d/l. dozed twice. its
sultry&drizzled in late afternoon. mother trusted the cousin back of dad's
house to bought pork from city, for he owns a truck&commutes. dinner is
delicious with pork&kelp.
a talkative night.^watched TV while attending d/l. sms sally as God lets.
chatted with baby&his mom,who want to try qq games. i warned her the
risk&sin of domestic warez, introducedfacebook's plan to join China&persuade
her be patient. also teased baby son.
benzrad's comment on the day.benzrad朱本主子卓 (
---so strong the claim. that's the superb of constitution, and the reason of
human. that's bible that saves the world sometimes so dark in history and
coming eras, as well as new land in never seen glroy.
in reference to: "That is how a judge lives in a state of trust, and I know
of no other way to make good on the aspirations that tell us who we are, and
who we mean to be, as the people of the United States." -
on Google Sidewiki)

27/6/2010backup baby's anniversary photos on sohu blog to other
blogs.^attending d/l most time when i read. a nephew returned from his
college in Wuhan, visited me, talked about his major. then discussed Chinese
society nowadays. i doubting surveillance so quit later&engaged again on
web. the devil, neighbor son, visited&trying to talk, left after rebuked.
after dinner download photos shot in baby's one year on the earth hosted on
sohu blog portal to other blogs, including baby's mom, emakingir's 163
blogs. lingered in waiting room waiting d/l finish. didn't talk to baby for
too busy.
managed to catch up unreads in greader.^got up earlier for a d/l. read then
napped awhile aside desk in front yard. backup stuff from web. supplement
yesterday's log&delayed likely by surveillance, which results in periodical
unaccessible for some sites. first time in this summer ate water melon.
dozed again after lunch while d/l. tried to contact concerned, sms sally,
buzzed baby's mom, emakingir, about her vacation. baby again accused my old
curses even i can't figure out when i did, but i sworn not in future&sorry
for the passed. its a bit funny why baby remembered i cursed him while i
only remember holy love&deeds between us. nothing more important than him in
my life.
arranged haircut tomorrow.^prepared pc to finish d/l a large game. dinner is
rich. haunted outside&shot photos for kids in village. fetched wire fork to
wind wires bought recently. the state grid worker in village offered the
fork, better than i expected. tried to meet elder brother to let him send me
next morning to local market to haircut but failed. a guy promised to do it
for me. roamed alone the road&chatted with a precast panels producer in his
workshop. watched TV after bath&sorted stuff. baby&his mom went outside,
returned near 9pm. she promised to talk online but didn't.

From 1st weekend's treat after reunited,
From 1st weekend's treat after reunited,
From 1st weekend's treat after reunited,
From baby's bath in his dad's arrival from
From baby's kindergarten show in
some slideshow from recent family activities
View all<>
Get your own <>
View all<>
Get your own <>
View all<>
Get your own <>
View all<>
Get your own <>

some home videos
family enjoy baptism in river Nen and buffet

family baptized in Nen river, enjoy buffet on way
from benzillar <> on Vimeo <>.
family showered in weekend at home.
baby's kindergarten party just upon his dad's return from hometown journey.

for picasaweb&flickr blocked within China mainland, the shit&dog dominated
sinful land, here some digest of photos hosted domestically.
some lily in Zhudajiu's old fish pond.
baby son, warrenzh, owner of domain, in his kindergarten's
benzrad just got haircut in a nearby village in his hometown journey.
family dined in KFC after baby son asked for it.
panorama of Nen river shore.

See and download the full gallery on posterous<>
Son dad

normal life on the track.

its had been almost a week since i arrived my baby's mother's home. past
week sees the pleasure between our ride on my shoulders for
several times and liked it. we saw some children outside and in most cases i
felt baby proud of his dad's presence. baby also asked to buy some food and
toy from the evil shop within the south garden, where in my second time
backward i had dispute with it and was sent to my hometown. lots of people i
don't felt familiar, but essentially old time returned. violence deeply
rooted in the environment my Royal seats, that really affect some members of
my family, like ema, my mother,etc. black dog constantly barking upon wrong
trees. God sees their poor plots and vain of their dirty wish to trap my
family. God sees glory of his son's Royal and untouchable purity of pride
and proud of my Royal.

its my first day in office of QRRS, my once and long time employer, also a
old style state-owned enterprise. evils still jammed in office on the same
floor. i dozed awhile amid the demons. in the past week, i mainly migrating
stuff i got in vacation on my notebook to dvds, but also surfed some time.
the Internet situation even worse here than that in my hometown. facebook
was blocked, so did picasaweb, twitter, youtube, to name a few. most
disgusts me is the blocking of picasaweb, for its dispensable for my first
camera, a best gift from Masheng, my Japanese fiancee. i also felt flat
while China surveillance banned most of domestic twitter copycats, like
fanfou, jiwai, with which my family had accounts. the dictator of China
really wrecked in fear of public and rapid communication, like twitter or
microblog tools.

the tour of returning to Qiqihar is interesting. the Harbin railway station
was shabby, the process of re-assign a seat for my ticket whose route was
missed by delay of its previous route, cost me near 3 hours. quite some
collegians there made unlawful transition on ticket, including quite some
Uyer. i finally lost my temper and sneer at a sick minded collegian. in the
waiting hall i encountered a female receptor and God shown me a lot that i
is the chosen. i was in deep proud and roamed there for more than 2 hours
till sleepiness drove me to the queue for boarding. there after finding a
seat, i at once felt into sleep. even after about 20 minutes doze, i
recharged a lot. when i woke up, i found a tall girl which at once remind me
of my girl zhou. but she is too slim and i decided its not what i pray for.
after aboard, she seats just behind me. but i again dozed. just a stop at
Daqing station, the tall girl missing, likely left the train at the station.
i soon attracted by a girl nearby, an athlete training school student. but
the facing seats, 2 dogs, heavily challenged me and interfering my
communication with the girl student, so i concentrated to kill the dogs. in
the night i was woke up by the threats targeting my baby son, and shit
according God's guide. God laughs toward all conspire aiming to trap my
Royal's untouchable proud and pride.

its a peaceful morning in office. the evils in the office both left. i see
God in every photon and every leaves outside of the window. i can't figure
out what its like my life here after the fruitful hometown journey, but God
surely knows my life in bliss approaching the gathering of my beloved, like
Masheng, girl zhou, Taiwan girl, girl lü, girl Jiang, and my Empire
treat for reunited.leaving the restaurant.
sunrise among morning fog.
Yangzi river was passing by.